I can honestly say, turning 30 has made be think about so many things. I feel like this year has been huge for my faith, my marriage, and for my children.
I have wanted to write this post for so long, but wanted to make sure I gathered all the thoughts I wanted to put down. I'm not sure I am at that point yet, but the time is now. With my blog going private, I wanted to make sure this was here, for anyone to read. I wanted the blog to go private by Wednesday, but wanted you all to read this more.
I'm not sure where exactly these thoughts come from. Maybe I am just old, or maybe it was the 2 or 3 weeks I actually watched the news. I started thinking about the things that are important to me and how I would be remembered by someone after meeting me. I honestly didn't like what I was thinking. Yes, I know people are not perfect and people have incredible traits, but do they really matter. I started to realize that the things I am sometimes complimented on are not what I want people to think of when they remember me.
People tell me all the time how cute the girls look. Don't get me wrong, I love dressing the girls, especially matching :) Am I clothing them in the armor of God? Do they have what they need to go to battle?
That is what I want to be remembered by.
I find myself obsessing over what my house looks like. How people will think about how clean it is or that my curtains really are too short for my windows. Do people leave our home knowing who we serve? Do they know that being a family of believers is our top priority?
That is what I want to be remembered by.
I have made so many bad decisions. That is hard to write, but it is true. Is that the first thing that will come to someone's mind when they think of me? Do they take into consideration how far I have come and what I have accomplished?
That is what I want to be remembered by.
I want to be remembered as having a servant heart, by the good deeds I do.
I want to be remembered not by my possessions, but the difference I make.
I want to be remembered by my dedication and love for my family.
I want to be remembered as a person who stands up for what is right, no matter what.
I want to be remembered as a wife, who is a partner; and as a mother who teaches her children to serve and love God.
I want to be remembered for being a light.
More than anything I want to be remembered by my love for the Lord and my thankfulness for his abundant blessings.